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The “Chatter”….It never stops. October 29, 2008

Posted by kat in : bipolar disorder, addiction, mental health, Adhd, Depression, General , add a comment

I am finally back.  This last time I quit, because I didnt, and still dont understand how to use this stuff.  I am very challenged when it comes to understanding how to use these programs.  I dont know what will happen to this post. I dont know where it will go or who will read it, or how it will get there. But I am going to give it a try anyways. There seems to be some kind of therapeutic benefit out of just writing stuff down.  Maybe someone will see it somewhere, maybe I will find out where, maybe I wont.

I am sick and tired of having mental illness.  Never in my life did I think at age 43 I would be on SSDI, medicare and recieving ECT (electroconvulsive therapy).  Although I always knew something was wrong with me, causing me to try to numb whatever it was with drugs and alcohol I never was treated with any dignity, and never given a chance to talk to any type of professional who gave a shit.  I was hospitalized many times, and most against my will for being suicidal, or acting crazy, or needing help with detoxing from one substance or another.  I was released very quickly, and told to go to 12 step meetings, stop using and that was my problem.

I tried all of that, yes I am an addict, but something caused me to be that way and it wasnt just genetics, in fact no one in my family has any history af addiction or mental health issues.  I was always told I was just a “difficult” child.  That I was disrespectful, lazy, stupid, defiant, and as I got older, worthless and would never become anything important or useful.  I gravitated to abusive relationships, was unable to maintain employment, never had any respect from my family, and was always being told I wasnt good enough.  I believed I was worthless, and eventually became severely addicted to several drugs.  I had a child and for a while maintained a little stability.  I went to school and became a Registed Nurse.  I succeeded for a short time, and then got into another abusive relationship which was the demise of my ability to be a mother and a nurse.  I lost my license, and custody of my son, along with my dignity, and self-esteem. Eventually I had a complete melt down.  It was when I went to rehab, got clean and sober and after a few months it hit me.  How I had spent the last 20 years of my life screwing up everything that came my way.  I became catatonic. I became suicidal.  I had lost my will to survive, and I had always been a survivor.  I lost it all. I spent most of my days crying all day, or wishing to die.  The only reason I am still here is because of my precious boxer dog who stood by my side.  I couldnt imagine leaving her here all alone.  She was the only thing I still cared about.

Then I met a man.  It was a complete coincidence, and completely unexpected.  I was at the end of my rope. None of the medications I was on worked, or they had horrible side effects.  The “chatter” in my head never stopped.  I was told I needed ECT to have any chance of coming out of this state.  But in order to have the ECT I had to go three times a week at first, be there at 6 am , and have a ride both ways.  How was I going to do this when I had absolutely nobody.  Except for this man that I met through a friend I went to rehab with.  He was very quiet, but very kind, intelligent, and not judgemental.  He offered to take me to these treatments.  I told him he didnt know what he was getting himself into, but he insisted.  What could I say?  I really was curious about this guy.  He was different.  He was nice to me. I wasnt used to that.  He was patient and understanding.  I wasnt ready to have any kind of relationship, but it happened anyways.  I fell in love and so did he.  I still am not quite sure what made that happen, all I know is that is now more than a year and a half later.  We are still together, and our relationship is strong.  We  both have had our share of problems.  I have multiple mental health issues.  He is supportive, and doesnt take things personally when I am irritable or acting “funky” from my bipolar disorder and ADHD.  I am still getting ECT, and also psychotherapy and taking medication.  I have gotten my substance abuse under control for the most part. I have a wonderful psychiatrist who actually cares.  Finally I have some hope…. I know I have a long way to go.  But just knowing that I have support and am not alone is a major factor in my getting well.  I can only hope that it is my turn to have some type of happiness, and forget about the past.  I have a new life now, and look forward to the future.  Sometimes it is hard, and I want to give up.  But usually those feelings pass, and all is okay.  For now at least.